I’ve been thinking about my fears recently and trying to face them head-on. One thing that scares me the most is lack of independence. Normal humans take it for granted and sometimes even wish they had less independence. Think of how hard life would be if you had to constantly depend on others to do simple things like using the restroom or walking down the hall. This is something I’m struggling with currently because these are simple acts I currently need help with. People say I should take advantage, but you don’t realize how degrading it is to have to ask for help to do every day tasks until you’re in that position and want to be able to wipe your own ass without someone waiting for you to finish your deed so they can help you do it. Or help you shower. My least favorite thing is being dependent, but going through a major surgery has given me a lot of perspective and appreciation for the things I am normally able to do on my own. I will cherish my independence once I can get back to that place. I’m currently reading a book called “Daring Greatly” which addresses vulnerability — yet another thing I fear and hate, but it’s something we all have to accept and embrace at some point if we want to make it through the good and bad times. Our positive attitude to embrace these things will help us persevere through our struggles and make us stronger for whatever comes next.
So address your fears, bask in them and become comfortable because they’ll probably exist throughout your life. You can overcome them, but they may never fully go away; so might as well take control.
Love you all — we’re all struggling with something, but we’re never alone.
^^ Blu Jay
Thoughts of a Blu Jay 